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Self Care vs Car Wrecks – A Compassion Fatigue Story

Posted January 7, 2022 by admin

I am smart. I really enjoy using my smarts to solve problems: logic problems, crossword puzzles, strangers needing directions, my clients’ problems, my friends’ problems, and my family’s problems. But, fixing problems has a sinister side, just like any addiction, and one can develop compassion fatigue. The best way to explain “compassion fatigue” comes from […]

Someone Dimed Me Out

Posted December 17, 2021 by admin

I’m here because somebody, maybe somebody reading this, dimed me out. Threw me under the bus. Lied about me to the authorities. Said I was drunk in court. The truth is, I have never been drunk in court: yet. Never been drunk at the office…yet. Never lost my driver’s license because I’d been driving drunk…yet. […]

Seven Ways to Integrate Change

Posted December 10, 2021 by admin

One of the most-used words during the pandemic has been the word “change.” Each of our personal and professional worlds has undergone countless micro and macro changes; some for better, others for worse. The amount of adjustments we have been forced to make during the pandemic is almost incomprehensible to our brains and nervous systems. […]

LAP has strengthened my connection with others who are seeking sobriety, serenity and a balanced life while practicing law. – B.K., Boone
Of the tools for recovery from severe clinical depression, I found the single most effective and useful tool for me was the connection I had and the support I received from my LAP peer support mentor, another lawyer who had recovered from what I was going through. – B.C., Charlotte
The folks at LAP, both staff and volunteers, were indispensable in helping me through the licensing process. Since then I have become a volunteer and helped other lawyers in need. Truly a satisfying experience! – S.T., Charlotte

The most helpful and rewarding part of LAP is fellow attorneys’ support and friendship. Every few weeks we get together and discuss all those things that attorneys don’t usually share with each other: feelings, hopes, dreams and fears. As attorneys we often isolate and suffer alone. The LAP assures that won’t happen. – C.L.O., Wilmington
I knew I could not stop drinking and that my life was coming apart, but I could not “lower” myself to be in a recovery program with alcoholics. A LAP volunteer walked with me into the beginnings of my program of recovery. Today I am free from the bondage of my disease and live a life that before I could only dream of. – T.H., Chapel Hill
I am fortunate to attend a weekly lawyers’ support group in Charlotte. Over the years the people in this group have been beacons of hope and encouragement for me, working through all kinds of life’s problems: crippling depression, drug and alcohol addictions, tax problems, and anxiety. – S.H., Charlotte

Over the years, LAP has provided our firm with excellent CLE programs, which have consistently received positive feedback from attendees. The speakers are always informative and engaging. – Susan Clark, Kilpatrick Townsend & Stockton LLP, Winston Salem
The LAP program is exceptional because the speakers customize the program and carefully consider the audience. The content is always solid, practical, and insightful. The participants typically rate the LAP sessions among the highest on the program evaluations. – Aimee N. Wall, UNC School of Government, Chapel Hill
Every year our County Bar Association invites LAP to present a CLE program for our members. I am consistently impressed with the quality of LAP’s programs as they are always informative and entertaining, and the speakers are well prepared. – Susan Matthews, Patrick Harper & Dixon LLP, Hickory
Our judges consistently describe LAP presentations as “Excellent,” “Meaningful,” and one commented: “Extremely important to every judge new and old.” Because of how LAP presents its material, I have requests for repeat LAP presentations to allow more time to explore certain topics in greater depth, which is unusual for mental health topics. – Jessica Smith, UNC School of Government, Chapel Hill

I was broken and did not know where to turn after a failed suicide attempt. The LAP helped me find the people I needed to guide me to recovery and restore me to health. Not only am I back on my feet, I am a much better person and now know how to enjoy life. I owe the LAP my life and my career. I remain forever grateful. – S.B., Charlotte
I was a point in my life where I was confronted with a question - did I want to continue my life of misery or did I want to change? There was no halfway measure I could employ anymore to avoid the misery. Thankfully, the LAP created a program for me to not only recover, but to thrive in my personal life and professional career. – A.L., Charlotte
Towards the end of 2007 I asked for the help from LAP. I had no idea what the nature of the help would be. I had attended a LAP support meeting off and on for years. People in LAP were waiting until I was ready. When I crashed and burned, I was finally ready, and they welcomed me with open arms. – C.L.O., Wilmington

I needed help on two fronts: alcoholism and the Grievance Committee. When I reached out my hand for help, LAP was there for both. – D.U., Monroe
I feel so blessed that lawyers courageously share how they have been helped by LAP. The Minority Outreach Conference removes the stigma and shame of addiction and mental illness, in a compassionate, understanding and, at times, very humorous way. – A.M., Raleigh
Already sober when I became a lawyer, I relapsed partially due to the inherent stresses of the profession. I had no energy left to take care of myself. LAP was there when I needed support to get back on track and get my life back in balance. – R.N., Asheville

I am tremendously grateful for the support that the LAP provided when I was coping with a family member’s alcoholism and for the friendships that I have developed as an LAP volunteer. – T.F., Raleigh
I became involved in LAP in 1995 when I was in law school and 5 years sober. Helping others deal with their alcoholism and addiction has been crucial to my sense of belonging in the community of attorneys in North Carolina. – A.L., Charlotte
The LAP provided me with resources and guidance as I dealt with the roller coaster of my husband’s alcoholism, treatment, relapse and recovery. The assistance provided by LAP made me aware just how much my personal and professional life had been impacted as a result of the family disease of alcoholism. I got the help I needed. – R.S., Charlotte

For many years I knew I had a problem with alcohol, but I was unwilling to change. Finally after serious consequences mounted, I reached out to LAP for help. That was 5 years ago and I am forever grateful. LAP saved my life. – B.W., Raleigh
At two of the lowest moments in my life the LAP was there for me and truly saved me. The LAP has been part of the bedrock of my recovery and has provided some structure and "bones" for my recovery work. The person-to-person contact with LAP clients and volunteers has made a huge difference in maintaining a healthy recovery mode. – J.T., Charlotte
When my wife went to treatment, LAP staff and volunteers were the only people who really “got it” and understood what I was going through. While friends and family meant well, LAP was the only place I received any useful advice or tools. – N.W., Winston Salem

I was in complete denial about my alcoholism. When I hit a dramatic and well-publicized bottom, several local attorneys pointed me in the direction of LAP who helped get me into treatment. I have been gratefully clean and sober since 2009. – G.H., Goldsboro
LAP showed me that my health and happiness didn’t need to be dependent upon the status of my husband’s alcoholism or sobriety, and that I didn’t need to figure it all out on my own. – A.M.P., Mooresville
With help from LAP, I had been in recovery from alcoholism for several years when crippling depression struck. With more help, I was led to the right physician and medication plan and am once again leading a reasonably happy and useful life. – P.W., Brevard

At the annual LAP conference I reconnect with lawyer friends on a similar journey of recovery. It always recharges my batteries, refreshes my spirit, and renews my hope. I leave the event excited about another year of growth in recovery. – K.M., Charlotte
I thoroughly enjoyed the annual LAP conference. The positive energy and commitment of the volunteer attendees was inspiring to me as a new volunteer. – D.S., Charlotte
Every year, I look forward to our annual LAP conference to be spiritually fed, professionally networked, and personally fulfilled. – R.N., Asheville
The LAP Minority Outreach Conference provides an opportunity to openly discuss the daily struggles of practicing law and managing stress in my life. – D.C., Charlotte
The LAP Minority Outreach Conference allows us the opportunity to share, reflect, and solve real-life experiences of day-to-day struggles we face as legal professionals. – T.R., Winston-Salem

Until I got clean and sober myself and became a LAP volunteer, I never fully grasped how completely separate LAP is from the grievance process. LAP is truly here to help – and the confidentiality makes all the difference. – L.B., Fayetteville
LAP provided me with a place to turn to for help when I felt completely alone professionally and personally. LAP saved my life. – A.U., Charlotte
I began volunteering with LAP soon after beginning practice. LAP is a perfect extension of the service aspect of my personal recovery program. Acting as a mentor/monitor, attending the annual conference, and going on road trips to speak at CLEs has created lasting connections and deep friendships for me. –J.H., Asheville
I reached out to LAP when I needed help. I received compassion, respect and guidance. I didn’t initially follow the guidance and spent another two years looking for a different solution to my alcoholism. When I had finally had enough, I reached out to LAP again, and again I received compassion, respect and guidance. I am now living a happy and sober life and have been since 2011. – G.S., Charlotte