The Overwhelmed Brain

By Paul Colaianni

Sometimes, the biggest and hardest step to take is the one that pulls you farther from pride and closer to humility.

I walked around for years “knowing” I was right about many things. I believed in my personal truths so strongly that my beliefs became more important than my relationships.

Because of that, those relationships became strained. Some of them fell apart completely and never healed.

But at least I got to stay right! Even when I found out later that I was wrong. Right or wrong didn’t matter, though. Only my dignity mattered.

I thought it was more important to keep my dignity intact than my relationships.

When you make dignity more important than your relationships, you might discover your world getting smaller and smaller.

Sure, there are people we’d rather not spend time with. That’s understandable. But then there are others we’ve disagreed with who probably didn’t mean any harm. Our pride got in the way, making us choose to cut ties with them rather than open up and compromise a bit.

It takes two people to step toward humility to repair a broken connection. Sometimes, one already has, but the other refuses.

Again, we don’t necessarily want to repair relationships that have been harmful to us. But what of those that haven’t? What about the ones that simply ended because one or both people refused to budge from their position?

I’ve come to adopt the philosophy that relationships are often more important than beliefs.

That doesn’t mean I seek new ones with people who may have different beliefs or values than I do, but it does mean I’m open to them—assuming the other person can be open to the idea that I might have different beliefs than they do, too.

It also means I’m willing to take those risky, scary steps toward humility for the most important relationships in my life. After all, some things cannot be replaced.